history, herstory + who cares?

selves imposed a threat
oh your name moaned
in mood lighting

repeating selves
each without history

my love
15 minutes late
and i cannot breathe

and now i must mend this?

i don't think
what i said was true

i, heather utah,
would like to
formally issue
a retraction
of the words

the unbearable lightness
and a drastic
change of tradition

imposed a place
a threat to mend a gap

i sat in the queen chair
you, eunuch
number one left hand man

THIS ENDS TONIGHT

grasping, lies + reality

trying to be
without actually bean

STOP WITH YOUR
SLANDEROUS LIES

looking into your eyes
i'm having trouble
seeing next thursday
let alone infinity

it increases physical
awareness -

please, please

becoming is a reality
not imagined, not dreamt
but a state full of
you and of me

when i was very young
i stayed home
collected stamps
and made up people
named after fonts

backing out
of a tender tendril
if only to be lost
again, shining

WE, SORCERERS

maybe i will stand
by and document your fall
with sexual distance

piercing, needless + needles

but i flew to the shores
of a web
to find you
only to throw you
back from whence
you came

speech is nothing
i can only show you
my silly portal trying

we are beginning
to crepp out
of the ventilation

changing behaviors
grandiose noise but

i know the dirty rag
in your corners
and what they meant
to you and to me

i am no thing
compared to the
needles you cave to

SO WHAT SO FUCKING WHAT

i only wanted to make
htings
right between these selves

that act of piercing
together
harming to mend

what brought you here?

boner, sonar + lots of stabbing

bodymind

you and both
know this is true

i am trying
to rob you of your
organs
spleen, please

how did it come
to this?
soft chine world

underwater
subsonar
roar

in a quiet
fore shadow of doubt

likes ::
knitting shivs
wielding ball
peen hammers

tastes the blood
from the bite

knowing inside and out
literally
pulling it out of your body

i only wanted you
to know
why
i wanted everything

quotes, homes + cumming

'and there are no tombs
in the galapagos islands, the
ocean gets all
the bodies to use
as it will'
-vonnegut
(galapagos)

COME
HOME

wishing lasts forever

i love you
but i will never
go[t] to longueuil
again

breaking every rule
if only to see you
again

WANNA FIGHT ABOUT IT???

just fucking do it

i am waiting for a
bus to get on the bus
and maybe
to not get off of it
to meet fellow
cephalopod

THIS IS NOT YOU
THIS IS ME TRYING
TO REMEMBER YOU

try talkingnormally
for once

grinding, binding + needles

life is
measured by the
amount of people
who leave it

i just wanted you
to stick your
hand up my shirt

E is a good
letter to have on
ones side

THANKS FOR
ROCKING

what exactly
are you doing?

grind my bones
to make my bread
in bed
my last night in bed
with you

:: im crying
because i wanted you
to see the full range
of my emotions ::

this is dangerous
played too sharp
it was like love
familiar earthen
smell

i can only say it
so many times

wicked, stupid
girl, i could
love you ten
thousand times
a minute

smut, thread + advertisment

i like it
its like a third eye

this house is
turning into
a home

dont
you laugh at me

RE: hot hot possible
percussionist
you wore blue and rocked
a skunk spot -
i would like to
see more of you
marry me?

DON'T TELL MOM

everything is fine

DIABOLICAL
ROMANTICISM

finding your soulmate
on an alien planet
volunteer pioneer
bring water for
the trip
(mars is cold)

i am an orphan
to the alley

support your
local oppressors